If success were measured by the time you spend doing exactly what you want, how successful would you be?
This question has been on my mind as I reflect on Brave New World—a book that challenges us to question the narratives we've been taught. As a biracial woman living in Utah in 2025, I’ve found that societal conditioning plays a powerful role in shaping our understanding of success, identity, and self-worth. But the good news? Once we recognize it, we can redefine success on our own terms.
What Have We Been Conditioned to Believe?
Conditioning is the process through which societal norms, cultural expectations, upbringing, and media shape our beliefs—often without us realizing it. From an early age, we absorb messages about what success should look like, who we should be, and how we should navigate work and life.
For some, that might mean believing that career success requires constant hustle. For others, it could mean feeling pressure to conform to traditional leadership styles, even when they don’t align with their natural strengths.
A Personal Perspective
I’ve experienced firsthand how different backgrounds and identities come with unique forms of conditioning. The expectation to “fit in” can lead to the suppression of individuality, while societal norms around work ethic and leadership may not always reflect the strengths and values of diverse professionals.
Bringing Awareness to Conditioning
The first step to breaking free is awareness. Ask yourself:
What beliefs do I hold about success, happiness, and work?
Where did these beliefs come from?
Do they truly align with who I am today?
Take time to reflect, journal, or discuss these questions with a mentor or friend. The goal is to uncover the subconscious narratives that may be shaping your decisions without your consent.
How Conditioning Shows Up in the Workplace
Conditioning doesn’t just influence our personal lives—it shows up in the workplace, too. Here are some common examples:
Long hours = Productivity: Many of us have been taught that working long hours is a sign of dedication. But research shows that overwork often leads to burnout, not better results.
Conforming to workplace norms: Employees may feel pressure to suppress aspects of their identity in order to "fit in."
Rigid definitions of leadership: Traditional leadership models often reward extroversion and assertiveness, but leadership can also be about emotional intelligence, collaboration, and adaptability.
The Impact on Individuals and Teams
When conditioning goes unchecked, it can stifle innovation, authenticity, and overall well-being. Employees may feel disengaged, undervalued, or exhausted from trying to meet unrealistic standards. By fostering a workplace that values individuality, companies can unlock creativity, engagement, and stronger team dynamics.
Breaking Free: Redefining Success on Your Own Terms
Here’s how you can take action:
Advocate for yourself: Be clear about your needs and boundaries at work.
Redefine success: Move away from outdated definitions of achievement and craft a vision that aligns with your values.
Build inclusive workplaces: If you're in a leadership position, create environments where diverse perspectives are encouraged, not just tolerated.
To leave you with one final thought: What could you achieve if you let go of the beliefs that no longer serve you?
Bringing This Conversation to Your Workplace
If this topic resonates, consider exploring it further through a workshop or seminar for your team. A session on “Unlearning for Success: Breaking Free from Conditioning in Life and Work” could help individuals and teams:
Identify conditioned beliefs: Through guided reflection and discussion.
Understand workplace impact: With real-world examples and case studies.
Redefine success together: By creating action plans for more authentic career paths.
Empower growth: By highlighting inspiring stories of professionals who have rewritten their narratives.
At ModHR, we believe success is personal—and that workplaces thrive when individuals are empowered to define it for themselves. Let’s create work environments where people bring their full, authentic selves every day.
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